WEIRD GENIUS
WEALTH CODES:

Go From 'Woowoo' Weirdo
To One Wealthy Witch

 

Turn your cosmic quirks into clients, cash,
and crystal clear impact.

 

Join the Waitlist Now

I Cracked The Code On Why Brilliant Healers Like You
Stay Broke While Basic Witches Get Rich
(And It's Written In Your Stars).

If you're a hidden gem healer who's ever found yourself rage-scrolling Instagram at 2am,
watching practitioners with half your talent flaunt their booked-out calendars while you're stuck hustling to prove your worth...

It is not because you're not "GoOd EnOuGh."

It's because you've been ignoring your soul's service blueprint that turns spiritual gifts into cold hard cash.

SIGN ME UP FOR WEIRDLY WICKED WEALTH!

You're Still Stuck Tweaking Your 'About Me' Page
Instead of Dishing Out Your Medicine Because: 

❌ You think the word “niche” might as well be a hex — how TF could you narrow down your gifts when you can help literally everyone?!
❌ You can’t go all-in on your passion because your current job and responsibilities have you feelin' like you're already rolling a boulder uphill.
❌ You won’t claim authority because you're “not qualified enough,” so you sink another $400 into a course that just reinforces what you already know.

Babe, Lemme Break It Down For You...
None of ^^^ that ^^^ is the real problem.

The tea? You’re not destined to fail at your soul-powered passion —
but right now, you’re nailing self-sabotage in your business.

You think you need more knowledge…when all you really need is to TRUST THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR STARDUST-COVERED SCARS!
You keep investing in new strategies… when the real move is to quit abandoning the cosmic assignment you literally incarnated to fulfill!

Seer, you’ve been SLEEPING on the ONE tool that reveals
your exact cosmic competitive advantage: your birth chart.


Because guess what babe, your star chart isn’t a woowoo Myers-Briggs Test —
it’s the instruction manual for turning your weird genius into wicked wealth.

In This Mind-Blowing Training, You'll Discover:

🔮 My Signature Soul Arc System

  • Your birth chart isn’t some woo-woo Buzzfeed quiz. It’s your CEO playbook. I’ll show you how to use it as your business blueprint so you can quit spiraling in self-doubt and actually build the purpose-led brand your soul signed up for.

⚡ The Quantum 12-Pillar Revelation

  • Think “cosmic iOS update” for your life. Astrology usually leaves you with puzzle pieces missing — I’m handing you the whole damn picture so you can stop repeating the same stuck loops and actually make your next power move.

💰 Chiron, Your Hidden Skill Code

  • That sore spot you’ve been criticizing for decades? Yeah, turns out it’s your money-maker. I’ll show you how to flip your “soul struggle” into the exact premium expertise your dream clients are already begging for.

💎 Ceres, Your Hidden Wealth Code

  • Newsflash: hustling doesn’t make you rich, it makes you crispy. I’ll teach you how to build wealth that tastes like fat juicy grapes straight off a Napa Valley vine — where satisfaction is the soul strategy.

 🚀 From Starseed to Starborn CEO

  • No more over-analyzing your chart — it’s time to activate its power. Graduate from starry-eyed dreamer to embodied cosmic CEO, accelerating your impact like a Bugatti on the open road, just as the universe always intended.

Join The Waitlist for the 1 Hour Training & Jumpstart Your Starborn CEO Era!

Because your cosmic blueprint is waiting to become your business blueprint, and your ideal clients are searching for exactly what you were sent to Earth to offer.

We won't send spam. Unsubscribe at any time.

Enter My Orbit & We'll Start Turning Your Stars Into Your Strategy.

Learn to translate your starseed gifts into real-world impact,
aligned messaging, and a biz that feels like it's YOURS BY DESIGN.

Pop off with a paradigm shift

Experience that earth-shattering “Holy shit—THIS is why I went through all that trauma!” moment as I guide you through my signature Soul Arc perspective to interpreting the birth chart—where your lived experience and your soul’s design finally click into alignment.

Transform abstract insight into 3D magic

Through the Soul Arc lens, healing isn’t the finish line—it’s the alchemy. Your scars, sensitivity, and depth become your bad bitch bootcamp, turning lived experience into embodied power, tangible impact, and a legacy only your soul can anchor into the real world.

Meet your spirit's two "secret" Cosmic Codes

Astrology books missed them. Pop wisdom distorts them. But not me. I'll show you the TWO underdog planets your Soul encoded as direct portals to prosperity. Once decoded & embraced, you’ll move from “best-kept secret” to luminous authority — the one clients, colleagues, and communities can’t help but recognize.

START YOUR STARBORN CEO JOURNEY NOW
Snag Your VIP Pass

I’m Laurel.

Part Space Oracle.
Part Muppet Mentor.
Part Quantum Cadet.

 

100% human experiment here to activate hidden gem healers and aspiring Starborn CEOs—helping them decode their Soul’s Arc and turn their weird genius into wealth codes.

I help lightworkers, healers, and starseed practitioners connect the dots between their soul's syllabus and real-world business struggles—why pricing feels scary, boundaries are impossible, and marketing gives you the ICK!

I’m the bridge between woo-woo and results, and I CANNOT pretend what I do is anything less than life-changing magic!

I don’t just translate births charts—I activate cosmic agency and help you break the limits of what you thought was possible when you partner with the universe inside you.

Nothing like this has ever existed before me—Soul Arc Astrology is the sweet juicy passion fruit of MY weird genius' labor, fully unleashed!!!

Whether you’re total astro-newbie or been studying for years, I introduce a new perspective on reality as a WHOLE that makes everything in your life make sense—so you can finally turn it into wide reaching impact and predictable income.

I’ve lived through every pattern I help people break, turned trauma into treasure, and built a business that honors my cosmic design while creating massive impact. I’m not just studying this stuff—I’m living proof it works.

& if you don't believe me, just look at my chart.    ;)

YOU'VE GOT WHAT I NEED!!!

The Universe
Brought Us Together.
So Why Not Lean On In?


Your fear of being ‘too much’ is:
1) keeping ‘not enough’ in your bank account!
and 2) holding your soul’s hard-earned skills hostage from the people who need them most!!!!

& I’m NOT having ANY of it.

It's time to stop treating your birth chart like a fortune cookie when it holds the keys to your empathic empire.

Â